I’ve been suffering with my g-d knee for over ten months now. During that time the pain has been relentless, hardly noticeable, sharp, dull, debilitating, manageable – in other words, all over the place. Sometimes I cry out in pain before I even realize it’s hurting. Other times I go six, maybe even seven, minutes without thinking about it.
Some walks in the woods have been pleasant; those are usually the ones when the dogs are calm and the deer hiding. Other walks have been painful every step of the way.
I just started watching The Bucket List, Rob Reiner’s take on what two men do when they’re told they have only months to live. I’m only forty minutes into it, but the early scenes of Jack Nicholson’s character experiencing chemotherapy made me sit up and take notice. Nothing I’ve experienced yet with my knee comes anywhere close to the pain he portrays.
I’ve said this before; as bad as it is for me, it’s a lot worse for lots more people. That doesn’t make it any easier for me, but it is important to keep that perspective in mind.
But don’t fear, I expect it will all get worse. A woman who works down the hall asked me how I was feeling this morning. I told her that nothing had changed and that I didn’t expect it would. She resolutely said that I would feel better; she knew it.
Faith. Where do they sell that stuff?
Update 1: it's now three doctors who concur: they don't have a clue what's wrong.
Update 2: the pack is back.
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