Fighting the demon

Guilt is a powerful thing. Catholic guilt is especially powerful, right up there with Jewish guilt. Tina and I were a couple in high school and beginning college; we used to fight about whose fault something was. “It’s my fault.” “No, it’s mine.” “No, it was me.” (“You mean 'I’?” Snark. Snark.) This could go on for twenty minutes. I was Catholic and she was a Jew. We both wanted to take the blame, to assuage our guilt.

I’ve worked years to limit guilt’s hold on me, but it’s a powerful monster and hard to tame.

Since Monday I've lost the fight. We’re on vacation, sailing on the Celebrity Summit to Puerto Rico, but I spend about three hours each day doing Yale work. I could have blown it off but the guilt I would have felt would have been worse than just doing the work.

I could protest that the work was time-sensitive and how, working in a one-man office, there’s really no one else who can easily do it -- but the truth is it’s my work and I would feel guilty not doing it.

Damn those Catholics! I’d rather just be enjoying my vacation!

In fact though, I am. Today is the third sea day in a row and it’s a delight to be back aboard Celebrity. The ocean’s been a bit choppy but today it’s smooth as Connecticut ice. The usual drill is in effect: Ransom stays in the cabin all day while I go out and take in an activity now and then (or do Yale work!) and we get together for three meals.

Last night after dinner he returned to the cabin and I went out for “The World’s Hardest 60’s Music Trivia.” It was a lot of fun -- and definitely hard. I came in second, stumped by questions like, “What famous product did the mother of one of the Monkees invent?” I also missed “Lulu’s real name” and “Who wrote Daydream Believer"?

I’d tell you more about the cruise, but I have to check my Yale email.

I will tell you: Michael Nesmith’s mother Bette invented White Out, Lulu’s real name was Marie McDonald McLaughlin Lawrie and John Stewart of the Kingston Trio wrote Daydream Believer – not Neil Diamond as I and many others said (Diamond wrote I’m a Believer. I knew that.)

Blu, our dining room aboard Summit